Sunday, September 6, 2015

The Envelope, Please


If news reports are to be believed, the Washington Redskins of the NFL have instituted something called an "envelope fee". They will charge non season ticket holders a $50 fee to hold tickets at will call.

Now, this is clearly an outrageous anti-consumer money grab, and though it may be that after some bad publicity, the team won't actually go through with this policy, it is a very interesting opportunity for "revenue enhancement".

It's probably time for Broadway to implement a similar policy, perhaps as part of an "a la carte" menu of add-on pricing. With a little bit of brain storming I'm sure that we could come up with several additional fees that the modern theater goer would most happily fork over.

$50 will call charge.
$25 TKTS line fee (charge for the right to stand on line).
$5 window envelope for every transaction.
$35 "personal performance license fee" (The NFL has a lot of success with this one).
$10 usage surcharge for "free wifi".
$2 "deposit" for Playbills. Refunded with the return of a Playbill at the end of the show. Must be in pristine mint condition.
$3 "cup fee" for sippy cups.

There are a heck of a lot of things we could do with this. We'll save Broadway yet!

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