How many Republican presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. We don't want a squiggly one!
B. The lightbulb is un-American in that it has a liberal bias against providing light.
C. Ronald Reagan never kowtowed to any lightbulb!
D. Book me on Fox News to deny responsibility!
Any of the above are correct for the radical Conservatives. And oh so wrong.